07; Audio

[lesliemonster]

[Private to Omar Little]

Hello, Omar. This is Leslie Knope. We've spoken previously. [No mention of the warden assumption -- to be entirely fair, it was one that she made.]

As you've been informed, you and I will be working together towards your graduation. I'd like to meet and talk about where to go from here. Are you free for brunch? I have access to a waffle maker!

Comments

[omar]

[What's the best way to say ha ha ha, no, in warden-speak?]

Okay.

[But good luck finding him first, Leslie.]

[lesliemonster]

[Leslie waits long enough for the waffles to get cold. If there is anything that annoys Leslie more than tardiness, it is waffles gone to waste.

Then, she turns back to the comm.]

Mr. Little, did you get lost?

I think that the answer is no.

[omar]

Oh, did you mean today?

[lesliemonster]

Yes! Today. At this moment.

I made an awesome meal for you and now it's cold.

[omar]

My bad, warden, my bad.

I already ate today, though.

[lesliemonster]

You can just call me Leslie.

Then we can talk. You're clearly capable of that.

[omar]

A'ight. I'm just Omar, then.

Sure would like to have that brunch, though.

[lesliemonster]

I thought you already ate?

[omar]

S'why I'm asking for a rain check.

[lesliemonster]

On the meal? Absolutely anytime!

But not on the talking. Seriously -- we're both adults, here. Let's act like it.

[omar]

S'pose that depends on if you mean there be something adult about having a conversation. I just don't have all that much to say, truth be told.

[lesliemonster]

It's more adult than hiding.

Then it won't be a long talk. But we do need to talk, face to face. No rainchecks.

[omar]

Hiding. [NOBODY CALLS HIM CHICKEN, LESLIE.] You think Omar hiding from the likes of you?

[lesliemonster]

[WELP, SHE JUST DID.]

That is my assumption, but I'd love to be proven wrong.

[omar]

[The only reply is the "click" as he signs off... but the next day, the next time she exits and returns to her room, she'll find Omar there waiting for her, leaning against the wall with a cigarette.]

We do this, you gonna need to work on my supply, 'cause I'm running dangerously low right about now.

[lesliemonster]

[Ahh. Leslie, being raised in Pawnee and not on a floating prison, isn't used to being snuck up on (unless it is by a raccoon, and even in those instances, her reactions aren't pleasant). She jumps back, darting her head from side to side.]

Were you waiting out here until I walked out?

[omar]

No. [Yes.] So how about it, warden?

[lesliemonster]

[You totally did, Omar. But there are other matters to think about, so Leslie moves on.

But you totally did.]

How about what? What do you need a "supply" of?

[Because she's read his file -- Omar's very intelligent. He can't possibly think that she can him a supply of...drugs.

Dun dun dun!]

[omar]

[He holds up the cigarette meaningfully.] Newports. [That was probably anti-climactic, Leslie, sorry.] Needs a little quid for my quo, right?

[lesliemonster]

[Oh.

That is -- still not great. Leslie looks genuinely confused. Basically, Leslie always looks genuinely-whatever-she-is-feeling. Get used to it, Omar.]

You were just brought back from the dead. That doesn't make you want to quit smoking?

[omar]

Not unless it was a Newport with that shank in the lunch line, but I be pretty sure it were Smokey or Little Charlie or one of them [unprintable]s. [He doesn't swear often, and he rarely uses that word, but he can't help but feel it's deserved for whoever stuck him in the back with a piece of glass.

Besides, he has the feeling her reaction will be funny.]

[lesliemonster]

[WOW. Um. That is...that is certainly a word, that Omar just used. A word that Leslie has absolutely no authority at all at comment on.

So her eyes go wide, while she clearly gropes for something to say.]

Well...shank or no shank. You've got years ahead of you that you didn't have previously -- maybe you don't want them to end with lung cancer?

[omar]

[He was feeling a little down, Leslie, so thank you for that. He grins lazily.] That happen often in these part, you think?

[lesliemonster]

[You are welcome? This is all very confusing. She'd expected to be more on her game.]

Lung Cancer? Well, no. Not here. But the whole point is that you can go anywhere after graduation. You may wind up somewhere that you want to live in for a long time.

[omar]

Maybe you can make that part of my graduation plan, then, warden. [It's just as lazy as his smile, born of absolute skepticism. He has no intentions of actually graduating, sorry, Les! ...But not really all that sorry.]