Apology Tour 2012: Audio

[lesliemonster]

[ooc: post is backdated to three days after the Boardwalk Empire-esque flood.]

[Leslie Knope has spent the past three days in a self inflicted cocoon of SHAME. But even though she is now a law-breaking, Jesse-beating-up, moonshine-hustling criminal, and officially one of the worst people on the barge, she still has a job to do, darn it.

She has already apologized to Jesse, but that is not enough. Not nearly.

So she sits up, brushes herself off, and starts to speak:]

I would like to personally apologize to anyone that I may have offended, insulted, shamed, threatened, assaulted, murdered, waterboarded, knuckle punched, chainsawed, belittled, and/or put in a compromising position over the course of the last few days.

[Private to Toshiko]

I am sorry that I took your beautiful, intelligent brain and used it for evil.

[Private to Lua]

I am sorry that I took it upon myself to be your gang's token insane member.

[Private to Omar]

I am sorry that I put myself in the position where I was robbed by you. How are you?

Comments

[lesliemonster]

I wish I wasn't, but yes. I'm actually very good at it, too.

[sharpememory]

Wow, okay. When did that come up? How did you learn?

[lesliemonster]

How does someone learn to knit? Some things you just pick up from places.

[sharpememory]

Places like what?