Video One: Hello Citizens!

[lesliemonster]

Hello, Paw – um. Wait a—

[The screen comes up, and the viewer is treated to a lovely close up shot of a single, blue eye. Then a nose, and then there’s the rest of her! Leslie sits at her desk chair, wearing a blue blazer set that she specifically purchased for today. She clears her throat, and smiles.]

Hello. I am Leslie Knope, from Pawnee, Indiana. United States. Planet Earth. [A pause. How cool is this!?] I really admire the work that you all are doing here, and I am so happy for the opportunity to roll up my sleeves and pitch in. Metaphorically. Phorically, I would possibly change my shirt first and then help however I can.

[If anyone needs her to help build cabinets, she has a toolbox – no, Leslie! Stay on topic.] I’ve got a few ideas for upcoming community activities! Now, what is the status of your parks around here?

[Edit: Spam for residents of Level 8: Sitting in front of your doors, you will find a small basket of various candy treats, including several Nutra-Yum Bars. There is a note attached that says:

"A little taste of Pawnee, Indiana. From your new neighbor, Leslie Knope!

P.S. Please don't eat more than one Nutra-Yum bar a day or your teeth may fall out. That is not an expression, that is a legal disclaimer."]

Comments

[socoolbrewster]

...You know "phorically" isn't a word, right?

[lesliemonster]

[Sorry, teenager! She is riding high on multiple people inquiring after her ideas. All you get is a smile. albeit a less enthusiastic one.]

Thank you for listening to my message! What's your name?

[socoolbrewster]

[That's okay, Ed isn't discouraged at all. He's too busy doing his undead troll impression, complete with smug smirk.]

Ed. ...And by the way, we don't have parks. We've got a greenhouse and a CES and that's about the extent. Sorry to burst your bubble.

[...He's really not.]

[lesliemonster]

[As long as he is armed with only a smug smile and not 15 metric tons of toilet paper, he's fine. But there is something very Pikitusian about the kid.

You can do a lot worse than a fully functioning greenhouse and whatever the heck the CES is.

So, what do you teenagers do for recreation around here, if there aren't any parks?

[Yes -- Leslie does live in a parallel dimension where teenagers go to parks for fun. At least, that is what she did as a teen!]

[socoolbrewster]

Contained Environmental System or something. It's like a holodeck.

...Depends on the teenager? My human girlfriend [...Ish? He's not sure what they call it, really.] and I are trying to get a water battle going though. ...That or laser tag.

Why? You're not a teenager, what do you care?

[lesliemonster]

You’re part of the community I came here to serve. Why wouldn’t I care?

[socoolbrewster]

Uh.

[...He doesn't actually have an answer for that one.]

You're here to help one person. Kinda how it works.

[lesliemonster]

I feel the best way to help one person is to help the people around them, too.

It's really hard to be kick-ass when you're surrounded by the Jerry Gergiches of the world.

[socoolbrewster]

Sounds like something you'd find in a fortune cookie.

Who's Jerry Gergiche?

[lesliemonster]

I wouldn't know. There's one Chinese food restaurant in my town and they had to stop printing out paper fortunes because people kept eating them.

[Blech. How do you explain her good friend and valued co-

Well. How do you explain Jerry?]

He's like if you made a shrug into a human being. He's the human personification of a three-day old mosquito bite.